WHO AM I

WHO AM I?
When asked, “In one word describe yourself”, one never finds the one perfect word to describe self, not even two. Self description is like a bottomless pit.
Who am I?
A lucid question with infinite definition, judging from the fact that every human is everything including complex, that’s why till today we still study self to figure out why we are and who we are. How then would you be able to describe self when self itself is totally confusing?
Who am I?
Is “I” a creation of self or an accumulation of various factors? Definitely not a creation of self, for self in its true nature is dependent, dependent on others, how then can self be SELF when self never really is SELF but a reflection of probable self. If an accumulation then “I” can’t be defined by self but by the factors that determine “I”. No matter how “I” thinks, “I” is shaped and modeled not by self but life, substance, environment, peers, religion, friends, politics, institutions, states, countries and many more. So how then can I know who I am when I evolve with every given factor. If change is the only constant then “I” is a variable, if “I” can’t be an island, then “I” is a cosmopolitan city, “I” in its true nature is complex, irrational, unstable, unpredictable and above all confused. For what “I” is today wouldn’t be the same the next day. “I” hates rock today, tomorrow “I” is rocking Avril Lavigne, “I” prefers tall, slim dark and cute/handsome next day “I” is with average, fair, plus size and cute. “I” doesn’t like fish, next night “I” is in line at point-and-kill with cute/handsome, average and plus size. Movies are boring; over the weekend “I” is at the cinema. What is the big deal about the BB? Next month “I” has a numb finger from pinging. And it goes on.” I”, an insatiable evolving being with no defined face, moulded by its past, only sure of the present and elusive of the future. How then can I base my definition when the outcome of my tomorrow is unknown?
Who am I?
I am not what I am but what you make me to be, not by the totality of my choice but by the chances and circumstances that come my way, by the integration of different and other “I”s. I am only what I am by choice, choices made from what is given, which I have no control over, Thank God for choice. My true definition comes only with the present and similar circumstances, after which a pattern could be deduced but doesn’t mean irrational changes can’t be made when different variables create same situation. Example: “ I”, doesn’t cheat, but what happens when “I” is in a tight spot and passing means cheating? Would I still be “I”, or would I evolve to be a different “I”? Its clear and obvious that the characterizing factor determining “I” are the choice “I” makes, be it good or bad, wrong or right, slow or fast, positive or negative.
Who am I?
I could be one that makes the right choices, I could be one that makes wrong choices, or I could be the one that mixes both right and wrong choices to create a distinct “I”. Choices that make “I” feel in control and responsible, but in reality “I” is never in control, if it was, words like fate and destiny would be alien to the dictionary, but words like satisfaction, regret, fulfillment that gives “I” hope of control and responsibility. If “I”, a one word could be so complicated, what happens when “I” progresses to ME, WE, YOU, THEM, OTHERS and eventually EVERYBODY. I guess we could only find out if WE understand “I”, then WE can move on to YOU, OTHERS and eventually EVERYBODY…..God help WE.

In one word “WHO AM I?” COMPLEX